Almost February

I have been contemplating my Valentines.

Remember how I was going to send those out? Remember how I promised?

I still am... I just need a vision for them. And it is so not coming.

In December - when I decided I would send Valentines in February, instead of pulling myself together for Christmas Cards - it all seemed liked such a good idea. I wouldn't be as busy in February. I wouldn't have to struggle for addresses in February. I would have a budget unimpeded by Chrismas in February.

And my Valentines were going to be very cute. Very, very cute.

I was going to have some new pictures of my children by February. Pictures that showed how much my munchkins have grown, how cute they are, and how I could manage to make them all smile and refrain from hitting each other while I pushed a button.

I was going to have some idea to make the card fun. Some catch-phrase, some joke, some interesting tidbit to share that would make everyone smile because they were so glad they got a Valentine.

I was going to... oh, I don't know what I was going to do. Isn't that the point? That I hadn't the slightest idea what I was going to do. That all that mattered was that I didn't have to do it now?

Oh, yes, those imaginary Valentines were quite splendid where they lived in that vague incompleted portion of my brain.

But now what people? Now what?

Because, quite happily, January is almost over (let's all give a woot woot, which I generally don't do... but come on, to every time there is a season, and to every season there is a sucky month, and we all know what Winter's is) and this means that February is coming.

So, consider this fair warning.

The Valentines are coming.

But they might come on the 17th.

Or in March.

Or next December.

For Christmas.

No really, I'll pull myself together.

I promise.
I promise.
I promise.

So Far This Week...

... GQ has taken his recent "I will not eat anything you give me" habit to the unreasonable lengths of poking holes in a doughnut, and throwing it on the ground in apparent disgust.

... M has taken gum out of the garbage - after ballet, from someone in class - and chewed it herself. Yum.

... and E has been a normal, well-adjusted child who eats her dinner (and doughnut) and does not chew pre-used gum.

Meanwhile, I finished sewing some dolls for the girls which I did take pictures of, but will refrain from posting in an effort to spare you all.

About 20 minutes after I handed E and M the dolls, they broke. And I even read the instructions. And sometimes I even followed them.

I suppose I will have to practice a little more before I give anyone a gift.

Random Snapshots

I realized I haven't been taking much photographic evidence of my children's existence lately, so I left the camera downstairs hoping I'd take more pictures.

These stellar items were what I came up with... I am a photography GENIUS.... composition, lighting, texturing, and stuff. (Poetry, Photography, my talents are soooo endless... or something like that!)


These three love to watch anyone cooking. This must be because it is so rare. (I can't use all of my talents regularly, that would just be too much people!)

We played in the snow. I had been putting it off for about two years because - surprise, surprise - Jamie the pansy doesn't like to be cold.

Says E: "We never get to play in the snow!!!!!"

Anyway, it was sunny outside, so I geared them all up, geared myself up, and out we went. Then, GQ jumped in a puddle, got his mittens wet, took them off, stuck his hands in the snow, and started screaming.

Ten minutes after we'd gone outside I was relieved to find out that we would have to go inside.

Says Mom to sad E: "We are a family, and if GQ is unhappy we cannot make him stay outside."

Tragic.

This is when M got me in trouble.

You see, I saw her with this hat.

I took a picture.

I went upstairs and said to Justin: "M looked so cute wearing your hat... I just couldn't take it away."

Then, M used the hat to sop up a puddle of water in the middle of the living room.

I'm sure we can all imagine how that went.

This is GQ eating blueberries while he waited for his pancakes.

The end of my random photo collection. I am sure you all feel so inspired now.

Drama, Drama, Drama

GQ usually is ready for dinner before dinner is ready for him. I've tried feeding him early, but then he just screams at me while I eat. (He wants my food too.) So, I'd rather he'd scream while I cook... and then I enjoy my dinner in peace.

A few days ago, GQ was out of control. I finally decided to play some basketball clips for him online while we finished up dinner. Unfortunately, a lot of the clips included commentators - you know - commentating.

Just so you know, GQ does not appreciate commentating.

I was so mad because I stopped recording just when the commentator returned, and just when GQ came unglued yet again. It was the most hilarious part. Boy, does that kid love a little baaakeball.

Apparently I'm in Trouble

Today E got really mad at me.

Apparently last year I threw away a paper that came with her American Girl Doll that told how to properly care for the doll.

INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR!!!

Anyway, when she was explaining this to me, I was having a really hard time understanding. Somehow, it just wasn't on my mind.

So, I said: "E, I just don't understand what you're talking about. You are not making sense."

At which point, she yelled: "YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING!!!!!"

When I replied that yes, this was in fact true, I didn't even know what she was saying - she gave me the look of death.

Who knew I was supposed to be so smart to be a mother?

Once I Was Part of a Band - And We Didn't Win Any Awards

I have written this post several times this week. You haven't noticed?

Oh, pardon me. It starts something like this:

I hate January. January is stupid. January is depressing. January should go away.

I even wrote a poem on the subject earlier this week, and e-mailed it to a good friend of mine. (Brief explanation: when I say 'poem,' I mean that I wrote my thoughts and failed to communicate them in complete sentences. I make no assertion that anything I write is anything like poetry.)

Here, I will share my poem with you. It is untitled. (Yes, I am that much of a poetry QUEEN.)

I
am
going
slowly
or
quickly
insane.

Die
January
Die.

Please
can we go to Australia
now.

Because I am presently throwing my life down the drain with inactivity, wasted time, indecision, and psychosis.

Still,
I am.

Oh, I HATE January.

Though I don't like February either.

Can it just be March?????????

I actually want to hit my head against the desk, throw my computer out the window, and drive on a really long road in some really warm country really fast with all the windows down.

This
would
solve
all
of
my
problems.

I am sure of it.

The End

Anyway, so I wrote this poem, and I wrote some blog posts - in my head, and then, I went to the grocery store. Wow. That is one exciting week. I bet you're sad you missed it. Although you probably didn't. You probably did the SAME thing. And you'll probably do it next week too. But, moving on...

Since it is Saturday, they were playing some full-on, down-country music on NPR. That's the kind of filler radio show we get out here in I - O - WA. Real country music. Appalachian Mountain Bluegrass Country Music.

(Yes, that is an official term. I made it up, and I am very official. Once I was even part of a bluegrass band called: "Three Girls in a Bluegrass Band, and a Boy who plays the Mandolin." We played mainly for ourselves, and did not have any actual instruments - but that is beside the point.)

Anyway, here is this man singing, and I swear his voice came off some 8 track - or other, much older, device.

And he started talking about his next song - which was about a girl and a motorcycle - and he gave this chortle/giggle (also an official term, I tell you what) when he mentioned that it had a red-headed girl in it. And I kind of identified, you know, with red-headed girls that cause trouble. I don't know, maybe because one I know recently used her Daddy's baseball cap to sop up spilled water from the rug. Or something like that.

And suddenly, as I heard him chortle/giggle about this song, which he wasn't sure he remembered all the words too, I felt better.

Because, seriously, did you know that life is not so serious?

And did you know that someday it will actually be green again.

And as for January, let me tell you something.

The enemy's days are numbered.

At Breakfast

GQ has been climbing on the table lately, which doesn't really work out too well what with the nose-diving he normally does afterward. E and M were apparently worried about it this morning.

Says E: Mom, I know how we can keep GQ off the table when we're playing legos, we can get the big blocks and put them in the front room.

Mom: Okay, that sounds good.

Says M: Mom, I know how we can keep GQ off the table. We can POKE him.

And when Justin and I just looked at her.

Says M: Not with something sharp.... just with our fingers.

Probably a good idea too!

Today

Today, E wanted a bun in the hair - with a green ribbon - so she could be Tinkerbell. She wore a green shirt that has a skirt on it to complete the outfit. She was so specific about every request.

Then, she told me she looked funny.

I think she's cute.

M, on the other hand, asked me to put her hood up and then button ALL her buttons. She was also very specific. She think's she looks wonderful.

Although, I've got to say, she does look a little funny too :)

GQ likes to sit on Dad's lap and watch Basketball clips on ESPN. He says basketball so cute, and does add an "S" sometimes, though he obviously wouldn't do it for me this time.